“I think we should see other people.”

I’ve been struggling to blog these past couple weeks. It’s not that I haven’t had topics to discuss or thoughts to share, but it’s that when they grab me, I’m not sure I want to share them. Coming to the end of a revision always leaves me feeling a little lost. My main characters voice grows quiet, and with her absence I’m left a little hollow.

When you spend a lot of time talking to characters, bickering about how things are going to go or examining their motives, their feelings, their world, your world, your motives, your feelings can get tossed to the wayside. This may not be true for all writers, but it is for me.

I can disconnect a little too much from myself while writing. This particular revision maybe even more than the others, the disconnect was more acute. I can’t pinpoint the reason, other than this revision has been the most in depth. I spent a lot of time examining character arcs, not just my main character and her counterpart/love interest, but the other significant characters. I learned so much about them, and fell so much more in love with them, or more in hate in the case of the villain (although, honestly, villains rock my world, so…), that each one took on a life inside me.

When the bulk of the revising was finished, and what was left was minor tweaks, my characters voices left me with a whoosh. In their place were bouts of melancholy and aimlessness.

I was forced into actual conversations with living people. (Weird.) I went shoe shopping and got overwhelmed by all the selection. Too many and yet, nothing. (Sad.) I realized people in my life needed help, mine or someones, and those muscles were out of practice. (Woah.)

The past couple of weeks have been a little eye-opening. Getting away from my MC was scary at first. It’s like being away from your codependent boyfriend. Will he stop loving you or you stop loving him if you have breathing room? If you can’t see him, will he still think about you? The answer is hold on, simma. (Do you guys remember that skit on SNL?) That’s not how it works, and not ever how it should be, and if it is, there’s something majorly wrong there.

My advice to any writer coming up to the end of a revision: don’t be afraid of a little distance. Your characters won’t die without you. In fact, it’s only by distance that you can allow readers to fall in love. Or that you can handle feedback when it comes. Or that you can accept more edits. Eventually your words will, hopefully, be loved by many others. They won’t care about how you feel about your characters, because your characters become theirs.

That why we write, isn’t it? I know that’s one reason I love to read. Here’s a funny post from buzz feed illustrating that very thing. So, to sum up, the end of a revision is not a break up, it is a girls night, a boy night, a moms weekend. It’s you and your characters seeing friends so that you don’t kill each other. It’s wonderful, and hopefully, fruitful.

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2 thoughts on ““I think we should see other people.”

  1. I can’t tell you how happy I am (sorry!) that you feel this way too! I’m actively trying to find reasons to not hang out with my friends and worrying what’s wrong with me. But when I’m stuck in my own little world with fictional people I love, I tend to detach from almost everyone around me and it’s hard to break back into being social. And then there’s always a book I want to read with characters I adore and sometimes they’re just more fun. 😉

    It’s great to hear that you’ve learned a lot about O & P. You know I already adore them so I can’t wait to read their whole story!

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